Thank Your Tank

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Thank Your Tank

Postby Debillus » Wed Sep 07, 2005 5:58 am

Coyotee, a long time precense/phenomenone on the official EQLive and EQ2 forums has joined forces with EQ2Realm to post some of his crazy ramblings in a more official capacity .. for those who haven't met with his posts yet, they're usualy quite amusing ... this one's no exception.

/Deb


Source : http://eq2.crgaming.com/viewarticle.asp?Article=9074
More Coyotee : http://eq2.crgaming.com/viewarticle.asp?Article=9123
Coyotee on the EQ2 forums : http://eqiiforums.station.sony.com/eq2/ ... .id=191296

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Thank Your Tank

“This is Coyotee Sharptongue with Casters Realm News reporting to you LIVE from the Nettleville Hovel where an interesting event is taking place.� The large Kerra makes his way towards a small gathering of warriors.

“Warriors, guardians, fighters of all shape and size have gathered today to celebrate and help people become aware of what they consider, an on going issue. Standing with me today is local Qeynos Guardian Ted Anburied.� Coyotee moves beside a large barbarian warrior who gives a small wave.�

“Ted, what brings you and your friends to Nettleville today?� Coyotee asks amidst the cheers and general rowdiness of the gathered fighters.

“Well Coyotee, we, the warriors of Qeynos have decided that today will be the first ever, unofficial “Thank your Tank� day!� He smiles as his declaration brings a roar of cheer from the fighters behind him.

“Thank your Tank?� Coyotee asks smiling. “And can you tell us Ted, how this idea came about?� He inquires as the large warrior nods.

“Sure can. You see, being a tank is a thankless job. You are expected to jump into the heart of the battle and become the opponents main focus. This is sometimes done without the consent, or even the opinion of the fighter himself.� Ted explains as Coyotee tilts his head.

“But surely you can see, that is your job, or role in an adventuring party?� Coyotee asks as he holds out the microphone.

“We’re not disputing that Coyotee.� The warrior explains. “But what about our say in the matter? Everyone just expects us to be the meat shield and get chewed apart while they stand safely back and huck rocks at whatever it is that’s trying to eat me.� He sighs.

“But isn’t that why you travel with clerics? To heal and cure your wounds?� Coyotee continues his questioning as the warrior shakes his head.

“Clerics. Feh. Look, if you had a big box of Band-Aids, would you constantly stick your face in a blender just because you could cover the wounds? No. It’s not easy being the “tank�. Just because we can take a few shots, doesn’t mean it doesn’t HURT.� He sighs.

“People think WE are nothing more than stupid mounds of muscle built to take a hit. Its an ugly stereotype, and one we hope to put to rest.� He says proudly as he reaches down and picks up a leather bag.

“An ugly stereotype indeed.� Coyotee agrees as he watches the warrior dig through the bag.

“I’m tired of people just assuming that because we are stronger and bigger that we are not intelligent. That’s why a good Swashbuckler buddy of mine, Kadesso, and I came up with the idea of forming an awareness group! We even have buttons!� He grins excitedly as he starts passing out buttons to the crowd of warriors behind him.

“People will see our tags and KNOW that we aren’t the typical dumb wall of muscle. That we are Tanks With Intelligent Thoughts!� He proclaims with a roar drawing more cheers from the crowd behind him.

“Tanks….with..intelligent..thoughts?� Coyotee blinks as he stares at the button on Ted’s tunic.

“That’s right! Kad came up with the slogan? What do you think?� He asks as he thrusts out his chest to proudly display a button with the words “I am a T.W.I.T.� on it.

Coyotee tilts his head as he looks at the button, then at Ted.

“Ahem..have…have you READ the buttons?� Coyotee asks as Ted looks down at his chest, his smile slowly fading.

“Oh…son of a bitch.� He grumbles in a low voice.

“DAMN IT KADESSO!� Ted screams to an unseen figure off camera as he and the other T.W.I.T.’s go charging after him, leaving the Reporter alone.

“So remember folks, being a Tank isn’t as easy as it looks, so be sure to Thank your Tank. Back to you Tom and Diane.� Coyotee ends with a chuckle as the camera fades to black.
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Debillus
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